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my first contribution . . . . so be gentle with me!! ai - ai - ai - ai - ai! you - you - you - you - you! uno! dos! tres! quatro! A F#m E D A F#m my teacher asked me where my homework was and that’s when i told her E D \"no hablo ingles\" A F#m E D A policeman caught me doing ninety and that’s when he pulled me over E D \"no hablo ingles\" A F#m E D A F#m A hippie with A tambourine asking me if i could spare A dollar E D \"no hablo ingles\" A F#m E D A F#m some douchebag at the club tries to pick A fight and grabs my collar E D \"no hablo ingles\" G ( one! ) when i’m not feeling it! D ( two! ) when someone’s full of shit! A ( three! ) D A when i get cut off at the ba - A - A - A - ar! G to make A getaway D it’s all you’ve gotta say! E ( quatro! sinco! seis! ) A \"no hablo ingles!\" F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" A F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" A F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" ( hey! hey! hey! ) A F#m E D A F#m my nephew asked me if i’d take him to the jonas brothers movie E D \"no hablo ingles\" A F#m E D A F#m walking my dog i saw A sign that says to please pick up the doodie E D \"no hablo ingles\" A F#m E D A F#m my mama gets mad ’cause i never call my dad on his birthday E D \"no hablo ingles\" A guy walks up and says \"doda esta casel de pepe\" ( one! ) G so many different uses! ( two! ) A you don’t need no excuses! ( three! ) D A D it’s as easy as the third gra - A - A - A - ade! G the perfect getaway! D it’s all you’ve gotta say! E ( quatro! sinco! seis! ) \"no hablo ingles!\" A \"no hablo ingles!\" F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" A F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" A F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" - - - spanish bit - - - - alternate E & F ( without barring ) did you brush your teeth! ? ( no hablo ingles! ) where’d you leave your pants! ? ( no hablo ingles! ) did you feed the fish! ? ( no hablo ingles! ) do you like my band! ? . . . wait , don’t answer that A \"no hablo ingles!\" F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" A F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\" A F#m E D \"no hablo ingles!\"